Don't be replaced

2005-05-03 - 1:30 p.m.

So, because I am a scourge to computers everywhere and don't even have to personally own them to cause them to go wack, just maybe depend on them to do my job so I can earn my f'n living, of course my office computer is now behaving as if it were possessed by satanic spirits. And I'm still trying to make the motherfucking brochure that my boss is whining about. I feel like I need to either scream or go smoke pot. And I already did that at lunch time. Smoked pot, not screamed. I haven't screamed yet.

Ladies, if you want more dick than you are currently getting, buy yourself a s*x t0y and tell your man about it. They become competitive about it and make sure that you don't replace them with a piece of rubber and a set of batteries. Yesterday, I called Flash and asked if he had time to stop and see me before he went home from work. He said he had to get on home. I said, ok, maybe I'd see him later in the week. He asked if I wasn't still tingling from the other day, and I said not anymore, but that was ok, because I'd gotten my toy and that would take care of me.

He showed up at my house. And proceeded to really put a smile on my face yesterday. I can't help but think that there's a direct correlation between his actions and my purchase. I told my friend Linsey (who bought one too), and we laughed and laughed. I'm getting a lot of mileage out of this, all puns fully intended.

Well, time to wrestle with the computer again.

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still here - 2009-12-18
and so it goes - 2008-12-16
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