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Happy Bloomsday`
2004-06-16 - 6:18 p.m. Working late tonight, trying to woo a new client to our agency. I really, really am underpaid for the shit I do. But I also write my own ticket for when I�m available for work. Still, I think I deserve more money. When I leave work, I�m going across the street to the Irish Pub (hey, it�s the 100th anniversary of Bloomsday! That�s a reference to James Joyce�s Ulysses for you non-literary types) for steak night. I�m treating my friend Linsey to a steak dinner for $9.99. Finally, something that I can afford! I�m probably going to drink a couple Guinness, too. Fuck it. We all know I�m self-destructive, right? (yes we do) No sex with Flash today. If he called, I was out running around town on work-related bs. Maybe I�ll catch up with him tomorrow. Or maybe I won�t. One of my friends (who shall remain nameless) is absolutely amazed that he still has sex with me even though I have hep c. Actually, at first so was I. But it�s not like I have AIDS, which is easily transmitted through sex. And we have safe sex, so it should be ok. He turns 40 this August, and will be getting a physical. I told him to insist that they screen him for the virus, but I don�t think it will show that he�s been infected. I�m sure I got mine from another route than sex. When ppl I don�t know well ask how I got it, I reply, �From leading a dissolute life.� That stops them in their tracks. Half aren�t sure what it was I just said to them, and the other half aren�t sure if I�m kidding or not, because I say it with a smile. I�m not kidding. That�s the way I got it. Am I sorry? Hell, yeah! Would I change things if I could? Fuckin� A! But I did what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it, and I�ve had more fun in my life than the average bear. I�ve laughed till I cried on many, many occasions. It may not have been cold drinks and moon pies every day, but it�s been close. Even the bad times have taught me good lessons. I�ve slept on a beach and awakened with the sunrise beside the man I loved, I�ve been twice to Europe, I�ve had 17.5 years as the mother of an intelligent and gorgeous daughter, I�ve had really dear friends who love me for me, warts and all, I�ve had the best and most supportive mom in the world beside me all of my life, I�ve been trusted with wonderful pets and given them good homes and tons of love, I�ve had deep friendships with ppl about whom I care deeply . . . it could be much, much worse, y�all. And now it�s time to go lift a pint of Guinness to a literary genius, and break bread with a friend. �
still here - 2009-12-18
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